Had a fantastic CUFirstTuesday show last night at our new home, HOME restaurant and bar in Silverlake. I love doing this show. I'm not gonna lie, it's a lot of work and there are times I'm like "why am I doing all this?"
Cuz I say this to myself all the time. Inevitably a child is having a tantrum (aka "meltdown" in Silverlakespeak) just as I'm walking out the door to go perform and I feel like I'm constantly making a choice between momming and comedy-ing.
But once I get to the show, it feels worth it. I see friends who come, introduce them to other friends, meet new people, make them laugh (ideally), hang with other comedians who make ME laugh (inevitably), collaborate with other funny peeps... I love it.
Even going to open mics is worthwhile. I remind myself I'm always learning from them, even if I bomb or there are angry comics who can't quite articulate why they're so angry (probably cuz of Trump, so who can blame them?).
And I get to escape a tantrum-meltdown for the night. If I can be ok with that, so can my kids. (And my supportive husband, who doesn't complain about watching the kids as long as I make sure to do a joke about his big dick).
And yes, the next morning I feed my kids toaster waffles, which they love so stop judging!
That's me talking to myself.
I realized I judge myself not so much for the toaster waffles -- they're delicious -- but because I see it as "taking the easy way out" cuz there's nothing to clean up and I know the kids will be nice to me. That should be how I determine every decision. So what if it's easy?
Less mess/kind kiddos. That should be the waffles' tag line. Hey, Trader Joe's Toaster Waffles: I just wrote you an unsolicited ad. You're welcome.
And sometimes my kids will tell a joke or make a drawing like my daughter's in her journal stating: "My Mom Does Comedy" and I feel super proud.
Every mom I know judges herself for not being something enough -- not crafty enough, not on time enough, not kale-cooking enough, not organic-bubble-bathing-enough, not placenta-preserving enough (There are people who do this! Google it)...not trying to earn a living off her blog enough... Not telling the "not enough" voice to STFU enough...
Every comedian I know judges him/herself for some joke that doesn't land or makes the audience uncomfortable because they sounded like they were making fun of homeless people but it was really satire/making fun of people with homes don't you get it?! (For instance.)
Can we stop judging ourselves? Or, as I learned in my Spiritual Psychology Masters program (true story) can we start forgiving ourselves for judging ourselves? (I'll explain another time)
Point is, I could not do this if I stayed in my old perfectionist judge judy mode.
The other day my son made this realization about me: "hey, mom, you make a fool of yourself for a living!" I was like, "Well, then I guess I'm living the dream."
This blog post is not perfect. But I gotta go and not work on my next show enough and not be happy about picking up my kids enough from school .
Feel free to share any comments in the comments!
P.S. The next CUFirst Tuesday is December 5th! Save the date!
Is it necessary to say RIP to Hugh? I feel like he got plenty of rest in life, seeing that he always had pajamas on.
I look forward to reading all the real accounts from former Playboy Bunnies, now that they can freely share without fear of the PJ man.
The closest I came to being a playboy bunny aside from the above pic from an old Halloween Post (believe it or not, it's photoshopped -- I know you're shocked!) was when I was TWELVE and went to a Halloween dance and two friends and I decided we should be bunnies. Playboy Bunnies. It didn't seem wrong at the time for twelve-year-olds to wanna be sex toys. We all wore bunny ears. My friends wore t-shirts with belts and fishnet stockings. I wore a sweatshirt and tights. Nobody wore pants. I didn't want to wear a belt because I didn't like my butt/thigh area and the sweatshirt hid all the "flaws."
I was twelve.
I'm so excited for this show on Tuesday!
C.U.F.T. was originally an open mic I hosted once a month at a place called Tribal Cafe in Echo Park. Tribal's a great place to work on material when you don't want anyone to actually watch or listen to you.
BUT this show at The Black Cat will be a lot more audience-friendly, with a lounge-y vibe, booked comics, and... well, booze. Not that you need booze to have a good time. You don't. I'm having a good time writing this post and I haven't had a sip.
But lots of my friends are parents and, after a long weekend with kids, mama needs a new sauvignon blanc!
And I LOVE booking great comics and seeing them do their acts. These people are hilarious, legit, and also all kind folk. YOU CAN BE FUNNY AND KIND. YES, YOU CAN! YES, WE CAN! (Speaking of Obama, he's funny and kind. His successor: not so funny. Not so kind. I rest my case.)
It's still part open-mic, cuz spontaneity's fresh. I love it when people show "their process" at the mic, or gear up to do standup for the first time. I've decided my mission is to get people to do things they think they might regret. (Spoiler alert: They won't regret it.)
Who doesn't wanna support that?
C U First Tuesday?
Marian Belgray's an L.A.-based standup comic and writer/producer who's contributed to HBO, Cinemax, Nickmom, Comedy Central, Pampers, Funny or Die, and TheNextFamily.com, and has created numerous comedy videos including the original animated- anatomical cartoon, "Dick and Jina." Marian’s performed at clubs around Los Angeles, including The Comedy Store, The Improv, IOWest, UCB, Malo, and Akbar. She hosts a monthly show called CUFirstTuesday, the first Tuesday of every month at Home Restaurant in Silverlake, and you can check out her new sketch team, Slackjaw at The Pack Theater in Hollywood every 4th Wednesday of the month.