Well, no matter. This one's not gonna embarrass anyone. And anyway, what teenager in 2025 is NOT gonna have a mom who exploited her/his childhood for internet fodder?
So I'm in the midst of potty training my little three-year-old. Things are going pretty well at the moment. She's wearing undies, having very few accidents, using the toilet at preschool...all the good stuff.
But we were at home the other day, and she was doing her "pee-pee dance." I said, "Elena, looks like your body's telling you to use the toilet."
And she said, "No. I'm Elsa!" (from Frozen, obviously. She's been Elsa since she was a 100% diaper-wearer).
I said, "ok, Elsa. Time to use the toilet."
She said, "but Elsa doesn't use the toilet."
I asked, "oh, does she use the potty? You can use the potty instead." (We give her both options. Probably another parenting no-no, because it can confuse the child, but in a moment of desperation a few months ago I bought her a tricked-out potty that sings when it senses anything hitting the bottom, intended for piss or shit but will also make noise for my five-year-old's Playmobile action figures and apparently the wind in the middle of the night. We still have it, for no good reason.)
She said, "no, Elsa NEVER pees or poops."
I said, "Yes she does! EVERYONE pees and poops!"
She insisted, "No, I never saw her go to the toilet in the movie."
She had a good point.
I went on to argue that they never SHOWED anybody going to the bathroom in the movie, but it happened in the scenes that were cut out. And I agreed with her that they SHOULD show the queen going to the bathroom and wiping herself and flushing the toilet and pulling up her pants and washing her hands, and that we'd better tell the movie-makers to include that next time.
So, my Disney writer friends (you know who you are), I'm so grateful when you bring us along to Disneyland on your day-pass, but what would really make my life awesome-er is if you could write in some bathroom scenes for the royals in your stories (especially those with special powers). It would help a lot. Thanks!